Core Personal/Cultural Related Arguments
An ever-growing and roughly categorized list of posts with arguments, musings, or ideas focused on the personal and cultural fallout from our ignorance and misunderstandings of the scientific and physiological realities of lady-gasms.
GROUP 1 (It’s a large cultural problem and it ain’t changed much): you’ll find further reading about statements such as the following:
For decades (maybe centuries) it’s been pretty clear why women don’t orgasm as often as they are capable of in partnered situations (spoiler: it has a lot to do with an obsession about the superiority of penis-in-vagina intercourse), but we as a culture refuse to acknowledge that reality.
The ‘Orgasm Gap” will persist until we address the root cultural ignorance of assuming a vagina can be banged into orgasm (i.e ‘solutions’ like better partner communication don’t really address the root of the problem).
Annamarie Jagose Getting to the Bottom of this Whole Orgasm Gap Thing
Lady-gasm Equality: We Need A Revolution Not More Communication in Bed
Can We Go Beyond Tackling This Problem by Blaming it on Partner Communication?
Dr. Ruth on Johnny Carson in 1982: The Culture of Lady-gasm Hasn't Changed Much
The Magical World of Girl Culture and Orgasms!!!
GROUP 2 (Ladies are coming at sex from a disadvantage we rarely recognize): you’ll find further reading about statements such as the following:
The sexual culture is centered largely on male fantasies, desires, arousal, and orgasm
Penile-vaginal intercourse should NOT be assumed as equally orgasmic for both parties (even though it’s OFTEN assumed to be)
Women and men are not approaching sex on an even playing field.
Women’s real world sexual experiences often reflect a shitty lack-of-focus on their fantasies, desires, arousal and orgasm. However, this shittiness is accepted as the norm, and any sexual boredom, indifference, disgust, or decreases of desire and interest are often blamed on innate qualities of being a female.
The Alternative Universe Orgasm
How Our F'd Up Sexual Culture Slowly Breaks Us Ladies And Our 'Gasms
A critique of “Hard Core”, and article by Natasha Vargas-Cooper
Teaching Boys to Masturbate the Unintentional Way!
Ribbed For Her Pleasure on the Interwebs: F’d up Shit
Those Ladies Putting On Bravado About Their Orgasms - A Free Flow Writing
We Should be More Clit Smart And We Should Be Angry We're Not
Girls vs. Boys - First Sexual Images?
SSL-Style Masturbation Manifesta
GROUP 3 (Women’s realities around “choosing” to orgasm): you’ll find further reading about statements such as the following:
Choice is only really possible if all the options are realistically available, and given the realities of our sexual culture, for women the ‘choice’ to orgasm is often not much of a choice.
Pleasure and "Choosing" to Have an Orgasm
Lady-gasms Are Barely A Thing In Sex, And We All Deal With It In Our Own Way
Does masturbation have to include orgasm - a debate with myself
I'm Inspired To Get A Little Personal Up In Here
GROUP 4 (incorrect assumptions about the nature of female sexuality can be harmful): you’ll find further reading about statements such as the following:
The idea that males and females are innately and significantly different in their sexualities, sex drive, and physical abilities for arousal and orgasm reinforces harmful stereotypes that bolsters dangerous norms in the way men approach sex with women